Finally making progress.

Today is September 30th.  It's now been almost 11 months that I have been in pain.  Tomorrow might be the day that I find out what's wrong.  With the tidbits I've been given and some comments made, my mind and the internet did some work and didn't come up with very good news.  Those 2 things together, the mind and the internet.  Sometimes makes us think the worst possible outcome might be possible.  On the flip side, I've got a pretty optimistic, positive side that says "no way, it's not that bad."  The pit of my stomach says it just might be.  No matter.  I am a firm believer that a positive attitude helps the body heal.  Truth is, I can think whatever I want at this point...before I get the results.  Who knows what will happen after.  Except for this.  I will have some decisions to make.  I will allow myself to cycle through all of the emotions.  I will...whatever that is...I just will.

Some back story.  Back in November my lower back started hurting and the pain started to radiate down my left leg.  In February I finally broke down and went to see my family doctor.  Sciatica and possible shingles was the diagnosis.  I was given an anti-biotic for the shingles and we discussed ways to help the sciatica.  The anti-biotic did nothing.  I started seeing a chiropractor for the sciatica.  It helped, but it wasn't going away the way I hoped it would.

Finally a few months later, I hired a personal trainer to get my body stronger.  That can only help things...and it has.  Has it "cured" the sciatica?  No.  I'm happy with my results regardless and absolutely love my trainer.

Three trips to my family doctor and finally blood tests are ordered, then more blood tests.  I am then sent to a rheumatologist.  She doesn't think I have RA, actually says no way I have it.  Orders more blood work, then sends me to a hematologist/oncologist.  This is when I start to worry a bit more.  She puts me at ease pretty quickly and says she doesn't really see anything too crazy.  Orders more blood work.  I try to get it done that day, but I haven't been drinking enough water and my blood won't flow, so I decide to come back after the weekend.  How many trips is this now to get blood work done?  6.  And how many times did I get stuck with a needle?  9.  I'll take responsibility for the one where she had to stick me twice since I hadn't drank enough water.  My first trip?  3 times.  Stuck. 3. times.  I told the girl I was a hard stick and I guess she took it as a challenge.  (can you tell this is one of my LEAST favorite things to do??)

So, now we're back to today.  I had an MRI done this morning.  Part way through, the tech stops the imaging and tells me he has to inject me with some contrast because he saw some abnormalities and had a radiologist take a look at the images.  Yes, ANOTHER needle stuck in my arm.  By the way, for those of you who have never had an MRI done...it's like a jackhammer is in your head.  I listened to music the whole time and that helped and I actually almost fell asleep as it's sort of hypnotic.  I knew when I left there that once the report was made on the images, the Rheumie would call me and want me in tomorrow to go over the results.  I already have an appointment scheduled for 2 weeks out, but I knew they would call to change it.  They're completely booked tomorrow, but want me to come in for a discussion with the Doc no matter what.  That doesn't usually mean good news.

So, while I have a pit in my stomach telling me something is wrong, I also have that peppy, optimistic voice telling me that no matter what she says, I'll get through it.